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The Fear of Public Speaking and Stage Anxiety

Have you ever felt you could sense people’s eyes on you? If so, you’ll understand the powerful impact a skilled public speaker can have. A confident public speaker radiates calmness, charisma, and ease when addressing an audience. Their voice remains steady, as if they were speaking to close friends, even if the audience is made up of strangers. Their tone is enthusiastic, sparking interest in the topic, and their body language complements their message without overshadowing the content of their speech.

Public speaking can be a daunting challenge for many, particularly if they feel they lack the necessary skills. Those nervous about speaking in front of others often have an internal feedback system that alerts them when something isn’t quite right. This can manifest in physical symptoms like sweating, a shaky voice, or mental blocks. Fortunately, there are effective treatments available, such as **NLP**’s fast phobia intervention and **Hypnotherapy**. Through **Hypnotherapy**, individuals can visualise themselves responding calmly in situations that once caused anxiety while also receiving suggestions for new behaviours and positive thought patterns. These techniques are offered in **North London**, **Hertfordshire**, **St Albans**, **Hemel Hempstead**, and also **online via Zoom** 💻.

Some individuals may be competent public speakers but struggle to captivate their audience truly. This can make it difficult for them to identify the root of the problem. They might receive feedback about their presentations falling flat or feeling disconnected from the audience, such as a lack of eye contact or visible disinterest. Incorporating hypnotic suggestions and basic body language and gestures training can be highly beneficial. This is where tailored **therapy** can make a lasting difference , helping speakers develop not just confidence, but genuine connection with their listeners.

Exploring the world of the “Satir categories” is a particular passion of mine. Virginia Satir’s groundbreaking work identified five physical gestures that reveal a person’s inner thoughts and behaviours. By recognising and interpreting these gestures, families in **therapy** can bridge gaps in understanding each other’s emotions and assumptions. These same insights are incredibly powerful when applied to public speaking and communication in general.

Incorporating these gestures into public speaking training, alongside techniques for voice modulation and the use of impactful sensory language, can significantly enhance presentations. These tools help to emphasise key points and keep the audience engaged throughout the talk 🎤✨.

Whether you’re seeking help for performance anxiety or looking to sharpen your impact in front of a crowd, combining **NLP**, **Hypnotherapy**, and strategic communication coaching can bring about remarkable transformation. Sessions are available in person across **Hertfordshire** and **St Albans**, or remotely via **Zoom**, making it easy and flexible to access the support you need.

One client shared: “I’ve found myself getting less worked up in meeting situations.” 😊

By Gemma Bailey

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The Application of Hypnosis in Pain Management

In 1838, the first recorded instance of painless hypnosis surgery took place. Dr. Elliotson seized the opportunity to demonstrate hypnosis (then referred to as mesmerism) to the public at London University College Hospital. By 1845, James Esdaile had successfully performed over 2,000 operations, including amputations, on hypnotised patients who reported feeling no pain during the procedures.

In 1955, hypnosis received official approval from the British Medical Association. This endorsement followed its successful use during World War II to treat soldiers suffering from post-traumatic stress and even to carry out surgeries in situations where medical resources were limited.

While the exact mechanism behind hypnosis for pain control remains unclear, research suggests it may be based on a ‘dissociation model’, similar to what is observed in patients with Multiple Personality Disorder. Dissociation can effectively eliminate pain by placing it in a kind of psychological storage area, away from the patient’s conscious awareness. Throughout history, there are numerous accounts of hypnosis being used as an alternative to anaesthetics.

This dissociation model is often called the “hidden observer” model of cognition.

Hypnotherapy, combined with modern techniques such as NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), can offer powerful results for those managing chronic discomfort. These methods are available through therapy sessions in North London, Hertfordshire, St Albans, and Hemel Hempstead, or conveniently online via Zoom 💻🧠.

NLP can also be an effective method for reducing pain. By identifying the submodalities associated with their pain, essentially the mental coding linked to the experience, individuals can adjust these submodalities to see how it affects their perception of pain. For example, they can focus on the submodalities of a pain-free area of the body or recall a time when they were free from pain to create a contrast. This allows them to adjust the submodalities of their pain to match those of a pain-free state. For instance, if someone describes their pain as a red, throbbing ball, they might experiment with reimagining it as a pink, wobbly blob to see if that changes their experience of discomfort.

This type of therapy, especially when combined with Hypnotherapy and NLP, is a gentle, drug-free alternative to managing certain types of pain. Practitioners in St Albans, Hertfordshire, or online on Zoom can guide you through this process to help you shift your perspective and, in turn, your physical experience.

It’s important to remember that pain is your body’s way of signalling that something is wrong. Before using these techniques to manage or override pain, you must seek approval from your doctor.

“I had tried many other options. I had nothing to lose and an open mind. Gemma made me feel extremely comfortable.” 😊

By Gemma Bailey

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Getting the Well-being Balance Back with NLP and Hypnotherapy

The Encarta® World English Dictionary defines well-being as: Supporting good health in a manner that encourages health and physical well-being (often used together). Good health or luck: a good, healthy, or comfortable condition.

However, another definition states: A good or satisfactory condition of existence; a state characterised by health, happiness, and prosperity; welfare: to influence the well-being of the nation and its people.

The second definition presents well-being as a combination of health, happiness, and prosperity rather than focusing on just one element. I believe this perspective offers a more accurate representation of true well-being. By evaluating different areas of our lives, perhaps through a coaching tool like the Wheel of Life, it becomes clear how interconnected these aspects are. For instance, financial stress can lead to health issues, while strong relationships can enhance our patience and tolerance in the workplace. True well-being flourishes when there is balance across all facets of our lives.

This is where Hypnotherapy, NLP, and therapy can play a vital role. Whether you’re based in North London, Hertfordshire, St Albans, Hemel Hempstead, or prefer sessions online on Zoom, these powerful approaches can help restore balance and clarity to all areas of life 🌿✨.

An interesting point about these definitions is their use of terms like “good” or “satisfactory” rather than more extravagant words such as “excellent” or “amazing.” It is vital for individuals to have dreams and goals, no matter how you label them. This is especially important for men, who often have abundant, intense energy (unlike the gentler, nurturing energy frequently associated with women). It is crucial to channel this energy into setting and achieving goals. Without them, a man may lose direction in life.

That said, it’s equally important to maintain realistic expectations. If you believe that every moment must be extraordinary to feel fulfilled, you may struggle to satisfy your well-being needs. Similarly, if you wait to experience well-being only after reaching your goals, you’ll spend significant time missing out on that feeling while working towards them. Why not embrace a sense of well-being as you pursue your ambitions? By setting more attainable expectations for feeling good, you can enhance your overall sense of well-being. Does this mean you should stop dreaming big? Absolutely not! Dream big, but take time daily to appreciate and find joy in the small victories 🌈.

For example:

Finances – An enormous goal could be to earn £100,000 in six months, but if you can feel prosperous by finding £1.00 down the back of the sofa, you’ll tap into feelings of prosperity more easily.

Health and Fitness – An enormous goal could be to lose three stone in eight months, but if you can feel the same sense of achievement with each pound you lose, you’ll be more motivated to continue working towards your goal.

Personal Relationships, A big goal could be getting married, but a more straightforward expectation that can make you feel good more quickly could be feeling connected to your partner during a date.

Spirituality – An enormous goal could be to achieve total spiritual enlightenment. Still, if you can feel spiritual even while your questions about life and the universe remain unanswered, you can always feel spiritual.

Personal Development – An enormous goal could be attending a £5,000 training course, but if you feel you’re developing yourself while reading a good book (like this one), you can grow much more quickly.

Fun, A big goal could be to have a certain number of holidays each year, but you can also have fun spending lunchtime with friends if you intend to enjoy the moment.

Career – Striving for a significant achievement like a promotion is great, but don’t forget that boosting your well-being can be as simple as recognising a colleague’s hard work and making them feel appreciated.

Family – While aiming for a harmonious household is a significant goal, finding immediate joy could be as simple as taking a weekend stroll with your family.

It’s important to have challenges in life for personal growth, but it’s equally important to simplify things. Some people make life more complicated than it needs to be, but I disagree with that approach. Making life easier can lead to a greater sense of well-being and attract more success.

If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or off-balance, therapy, Hypnotherapy, and NLP can help you gain insight, clear mental clutter, and restore a sense of calm. These services are available in St Albans, Hemel Hempstead, North London, and across the globe via Zoom 🧠💬.

By Gemma Bailey

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Improving Interpersonal Skills

When interacting with others, you are using interpersonal skills. Throughout your life, you have been developing these skills with varying degrees of success. Sometimes, connecting and communicating effectively with others feels effortless and natural. However, there are moments when you might feel like a stranger from another world, struggling to express your thoughts and intentions clearly. It may be time to enhance your interpersonal skills if you often feel awkward, out of control, or completely lost during interactions.

Strong interpersonal skills are essential if you want to make a positive impression, appear knowledgeable, exude confidence, or build genuine connections with others.

NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) offers specific techniques that can help you improve your interpersonal skills. For example:

Matching and Mirroring – This is the process of using your physiology, voice, and words to create similarity with the person you are communicating with. People tend to like those who are like themselves, and when you observe individuals who have a good rapport, you’ll notice they seem to “speak the same language” or move in sync. This usually happens unconsciously, but you can learn to use these processes to your advantage by understanding how these processes work.

Satir Categories – These refer to the natural physiological poses you adopt during communication. You may have noticed that some people use their hands a lot when they speak, but what messages are your gestures and posture sending to those you’re talking to? Others will often respond to you in ways that align with the unconscious signals you’re giving off. For example, you can expect others to react defensively if you appear aggressive.

Eliminating Significant Emotional Incidents – Past experiences that have negatively impacted your confidence can influence your behaviour. For instance, being humiliated by a teacher at school might lead to feeling uneasy around authority figures later in life. This can create challenges when you need to communicate confidently with your boss or others in positions of authority. NLP provides techniques to help you reframe old events, allowing you to change your emotional response to those memories and move forward with greater confidence.

By Gemma Bailey
www.hypnotherapyandnlp.co.uk

Understanding Insomnia

I came across an interesting story about the clinical hypnotherapist Milton Erickson, who once treated a patient struggling with sleep. Instead of lying awake tossing and turning for hours, Erickson advised the patient to get up and polish his kitchen floor until he was exhausted. Surprisingly, after a couple of nights of this unusual routine, the patient could quickly reprogram himself to fall asleep to avoid another night of cleaning.

Insomnia can manifest differently for each individual. Some people struggle to fall asleep initially, while others wake up too early and can’t drift back off. Some may sleep for many hours but still wake up feeling exhausted despite getting what seems like enough rest.

There are several practical points to consider when working with someone who has trouble sleeping.

Firstly, is the patient exercising enough? Regular exercise is a healthy way to burn off any excess if the body is overly energised or full of adrenaline.

Adrenaline can also be produced by stress, so what is causing the patient stress? Is it something at work, or perhaps a problematic relationship? They might be worrying about money, their health, or even their inability to sleep. Ironically, worrying about not sleeping can create a vicious cycle, further disrupting their sleep patterns.

Do they have a bedtime routine? This idea may be better suited to children, but the body thrives on repetition. Going to bed and waking up at similar times each day helps regulate your internal clock. If you’ve ever experienced jet lag, you’ll know how much your body and sleep routine suffer from a sudden change in time zones.

Are there any chemical factors at play? For example, is the patient taking any medication, drinking alcohol, or consuming stimulants like coffee?

Several subtle changes can be made to combat insomnia and address the abovementioned issues. Additionally, mastering relaxation techniques can be incredibly beneficial (many people don’t realise they don’t know how to relax properly!). Relaxation helps to ease tension in both the mind and body. When someone is stressed, their mind is racing with thoughts, and their muscles are tightly wound. In such a state, falling asleep becomes difficult, if not impossible. Learning hypnosis or meditation is a simple and effective way to achieve deep relaxation for the mind and body. Moreover, while in a hypnotic state, it’s possible to provide suggestions for deep, easy, and quick relaxation, which are more readily accepted by the subconscious mind compared to when in a normal waking state.

By Gemma Bailey
www.hypnotherapyandnlp.co.uk

Relaxation Technique for Stress Relief

In our fast-paced world, it’s common to find ourselves caught in a never-ending cycle of stress. The hustle and bustle of daily life triggers physical reactions in our bodies, releasing adrenaline during tense moments that we struggle to shake off. This excess adrenaline lingers in our system, becoming a toxic force that worsens our focus, shortens our patience, disrupts our sleep, and hampers our efficiency. This is what we refer to as stress. While a certain stress level is necessary for optimal performance, learning how to manage it effectively is essential.

Employers face a significant challenge with stress, leading to high sick leave rates. By offering support programmes, companies can address stress early on and help employees develop effective coping strategies to keep it under control.

On a personal level, stress often leaves you feeling tense and exhausted. Until you’ve booked your hypnotherapy session, why not try this simple relaxation technique? It will help you feel much more relaxed and only takes a few minutes.

1) Make yourself comfortable, ideally somewhere quiet, where you can close your eyes for a few moments.

2)  Sit back and begin to focus on your breathing. With each outward breath, think of the word “calm.” If you know your heartbeat, imagine it becoming safely slow and steady. Do this for 2 or 3 minutes.

3) Picture a calming, gentle light—whatever colour represents calm to you is the right one—and imagine the light slowly moving through your body. It will relax every part of your body as it flows through you while you continue your slow outward breaths, steady and rhythmic, echoing the word “calm” in your mind.

4) Move the light up, down, and through your body several times until every muscle and limb feels completely relaxed.

5) Take some deep, refreshing breaths, imagining the air as crisp and fresh, gently revitalising.

6) Open your eyes and think of the positive things you have and will achieve in your day.

Discover the power of NLP and Hypnotherapy for stress relief by scheduling a complimentary initial coaching consultation here: https://peoplebuilding.youcanbook.me.

by Gemma Bailey

www.HypnotherapyandNLP.co.uk

Trauma Victims

A person who has experienced a trauma is often in a victim state. This is because the incident gave them limited choices in the responses they could formulate at that particular time. They probably felt the circumstances were out of their control or perhaps trapped or in danger.

It is essential to highlight that these suggestions will only work for those whose trauma is in the past and is over. For those still living in a traumatic situation, a slightly different approach must be taken to help support that person in making new decisions about how to react in that situation now and in the future.

The trauma victim must be able to feel safe and secure at any time during the work you do together. This is because of the risk of abreaction during your therapeutic processes. A resource anchor can effectively get the client into a positive and resourceful state quickly and easily. However, you must be sure that the intensity of the resource anchor is significantly more potent than any potential traumatic emotion that might show up during the sessions you have together.

It is crucial to encourage the client to understand their role in shaping their thoughts and emotions. Recognise that the unfortunate event took place in the past and was indeed very distressing. It’s important to realise that the event itself is over, and what remains is the memory of it impacting the nervous system. The client is now perpetuating these thoughts and emotions rather than being controlled by external forces.

Alongside this crucial aspect, conveying your message with sensitivity is essential, ensuring that the client doesn’t feel blamed for their thoughts and emotions. This approach is counterproductive. Instead, focus on empowering language, emphasising concepts like “taking control now” and “choosing which emotions to embrace and when to experience them.”

Some therapists possess a unique X factor beyond NLP or Hypnosis training. It’s the ability to shift someone’s perspective completely with a simple reframe. Have you ever experienced that “Aha!” moment when your whole thinking changes in an instant? It’s a powerful skill, but it must be used wisely and with the client’s comfort in mind.

I recall working with a man who had suffered abuse as a child from another child. He often expressed his hatred for the abuser and how they had ruined his life. I tried to help him see the abuser in a different light, but it only made him more convinced of their evilness. When I asked him who he thought was abusing the abuser, he was shocked and defensive. However, after sharing some facts about abused children becoming abusers, it started to shift his perspective.

Hypnosis offers numerous advantages for addressing trauma. One effective method is regression, which allows clients to uncover details about their traumatic experiences that they may have overlooked. This newfound awareness can provide a fresh perspective when recalling the event in the future and allows for the possibility of re-experiencing the situation more constructively—expressing thoughts or actions that could have transformed the event into a less painful memory.

Additionally, hypnosis plays a crucial role in fostering tranquillity and alleviating the negative emotions tied to past experiences. This process also opens the door to instilling positive affirmations that clients can draw upon later. Clients need to practice these new positive tools. When they realise that the trauma belongs to the past and now only resides in their minds, it brings a sense of relief. However, it’s important to acknowledge that similar events may arise in their lives again. Clients must feel assured that they can approach any future trauma differently in a way that empowers them rather than re-traumatises them. This transformation can also occur during hypnosis.

 

By Gemma Bailey
www.hypnotherapyandnlp.co.uk

Building Immunity and Healing

There is ample evidence that stress negatively influences our health and our capacity to recover from illness. How many stressed individuals do you encounter who also deal with headaches, bodily discomfort, or frequent colds? I can certainly relate to this. In the past, I worked in a highly stressful environment where I often sacrificed my lunch breaks and weekends for work. Even when I was sick, I felt compelled to show up, enduring tonsillitis and other illnesses. I even took on shifts for others who were unwell, despite my struggles with health!

Everyone kept telling me to take a break or else I’d get ill. And I’d reply “Yeah I’d have to be half dead to stop me working!” So guess what happened? I got appendicitis! I had to have my appendix removed and was signed off work and unable to do practically anything for a month! It was as if my unconscious was telling me “If you believe that you need to be half dead to stop, then that’s exactly what you’re going to get!”

When we are in a good state of mind it inevitably has a positive impact on our bodies. We know for example that laughing and exercise cause the body to release endorphins, which are not only the body’s natural painkillers but also alleviate stress, therefore impacting the health and immunity of the body.

Yes, laughter is the best medicine! But if your jokes do not have others rolling around on the floor laughing, then Hypnotherapy could be a beneficial alternative.

It’s a vicious cycle between stress and illness or stress and pain. When stress hits, headaches may follow. Those headaches then become a source of stress on their own, making the patient worry about future aches and pains in their head. This leads to even more stress and anxiety once the headache sets in, hindering them from completing necessary tasks or avoiding work they dislike.

By throwing Hypnosis into the equation, we stimulate the hypothalamus which is responsible for creating moods and emotions. This can be used to induce suggestions of feeling happiness, relaxed, carefree, and fun. Simply by vividly remembering times in the past when these emotions have been experienced can onset the emotion itself. The release of the endorphin chemical can also be directed to reduce any pain that the patient is experiencing at that moment to begin to alleviate it.

Thus the cycle is broken. The endorphins aid the relaxation, pain relief and stress reduction.

By Gemma Bailey
www.hypnotherapyandnlp.co.uk 

Athletic Performance

My grandma always said, “Practice makes perfect.” But what she didn’t emphasize was the significance of practising with intention, visualizing success rather than dwelling on potential failure. How often do you find yourself wondering, “What’s the worst that could happen?!”

Athletes always strive for victory, aiming to be the best every single time. They know they have only one chance to succeed, so being anything less than perfect is out of the question.

When athletes come to me for help with their performance, the first thing I advise is to practice success. Visualize everything going perfectly: scoring the winning goal, achieving the longest jump, or moving at top speed. By focusing on success, you attract more of it, which is crucial for manifesting the desired outcome. Moreover, when you focus on something in your mind, you activate the same neural networks as if you were actually performing the act.

Scientists initially believed that neural networks existed only in the brain, but we now know that they are a network throughout your entire body. This means that if for example, you think about running, as you are laying in your bed, you will be activating and accessing the muscles in your legs. It is quite likely that they will twitch unconsciously as you consider moving them. This was famously noted by Milton Erickson, the man largely responsible for bringing hypnosis to the clinical arena. When Milton was a child he was struck with polio and left paralysed. As he sat in a chair, longing to be outside playing with his siblings, imagining running in the long grass and kicking the football, he noticed that his legs had begun to swing in the chair!

NLP utilises a technique called anchoring. In this, the mind creates a link between an intense feeling and an external trigger. This can have positive and negative implications for our athletes. For example, there may be negative anchors (triggers that create a bad feeling) associated with past failures which are set off whenever the athlete is performing or due to perform. If the trigger for the bad feeling can be established, then the negative anchor can easily be collapsed. If an athlete needs to tap into resourceful emotions, such as calm, focus or power, an anchor can be created with a trigger of, squeezing their fingers for example.

A simple way to become the best at what you do is to find someone else who is the best at it and find out how they do it. If you think that Thierry Henry is the best striker that the world has ever seen, it is possible to model the way that he thinks, feels and behaves to create the results he achieves. This is done using strategy elicitation which allows us to extract all of the conscious and unconscious components that create the behaviour, which leads to excellent results. When the strategy has been extracted, it can be installed in someone else using rehearsal, metaphors or hypnosis. Hypnosis provides a deep state of relaxation which can be prolonged to maintain calm and alleviate anxiety, as well as installing positive empowering suggestions, such as being able to focus and concentrate with ease.

At a deeper level of understanding, NLP can be used to discover a person’s values and uncover and resolve any conflicts here. For example, if a person has a value of success and a value of not being defeated, then there could be some problems here. For a start, not being defeated is what we would call an “away from” value, in that the person is trying to move away from something, in this case, to move away from defeat. This means that their focus is on defeat, making it likely that this is the thing that is achieved. This is then also in conflict with success, which could mean that success is sometimes achieved, but is not sustainable.

After all, if sports or athletics is your life, it’s not the taking part which counts, but the winning.

By Gemma Bailey
www.hypnotherapyandnlp.co.uk

Recollecting Memories

We’ve all been there, struggling to recall where we placed our keys, the name of a familiar face, or that one additional item we meant to grab at the grocery store. That feeling of frustration and irritation when you know the answer is just out of reach is something we can all relate to.

The conscious mind, which handles short-term memory, is believed to be just a small part of the entire human mind. The larger portion consists of the subconscious mind and long-term memories. For instance, when you try to memorise a number, like a phone number, it occupies your conscious mind until you’ve committed it to memory. After that, it shifts to your subconscious, allowing you to recall it without actively thinking about it. However, many people encounter difficulties when trying to retrieve information stored in their subconscious that they’ve consciously forgotten. Although the data is still there, accessing it can feel like searching for a book in a dark library with only a flashlight to guide you.

Usually, the information shows up again sometime later when you are least expecting it. This is a good thing to know because it tells us that getting stressed and continuing to try to find the information when we cannot, doesn’t help. You are much more likely to get the information back if you relax and think about something else. It’s a little like when you are late for an appointment and driving somewhere unfamiliar. As soon as you begin to feel stressed you will go into foveal vision and miss all of the clues that are there to get you to your destination. When you are relaxed you can see more in the periphery and notice the clues that will send you in the right direction.

However, when the information required is lodged away from the conscious mind, hypnosis can be a useful aid to retrieve it. Many people now have heard of using hypnosis for past life regression, but we can also use hypnosis to regress to previous times in our current life. This can be useful for those who want to go back in time and find lost information – this could be a set of lost keys, or something related to a deeper psychological problem.

When it comes to hypnosis work, the practitioner must establish clear boundaries. For instance, I may help someone address a past memory, but I won’t delve into uncovering potential abuse if the individual is unsure. There could be valid reasons why the unconscious mind is blocking such information, and revealing it prematurely could be harmful. It’s essential to consider the emotional readiness of the individual before proceeding.

By Gemma Bailey
www.hypnotherapyandnlp.co.uk